How many of us experienced our relationships with others go sour, if not worse, due to financial matters?
I bet you can share at least one incident with family, friends, or even in business. I've experienced it all, from small amounts to significant amounts. After a few weeks or months of no payments, it will make you question their character or integrity as a person. On their end, they may feel the constant shame and guilt of not being able to pay you back when they see you (if they're decent people). I even encountered people who didn't express any shame or guilt but entitlement.
Perhaps, that money didn't come back to prevent even worse incidents, such as your health or your loved ones' well-being, yet disappointments, frustration, or even anger can linger around; some of us hold on to that longer than others. Here is one positive perspective, we survived or came thus far without that money.
However, when it happened more than once, now, I am questioning myself what did I miss? I need to find some wisdom to prevent it from happening again because I don't necessarily agree or have a hard time just letting it go without understanding. It's the principle that bothered me the most.
Money is a direct link to our lives in so many ways. Hence, people are obsessed with it, chase it, and put enormous values that drive and live for it. But where do we go from here when you take that from someone who trusted you? or taken by someone you trusted? Of course, there's always the option of using legal systems. Even with contracts and agreements, you hear many stories about broken or failed business partnerships, even in marriage. And the emotions you experience through these conflicts don't go away as quickly, though. Sometimes people even get sick from this kind of event.
I am a believer in 'Everything happens for a reason.' Hence, I took the 'It takes two to tango.' approach since they've displayed their integrity that does not align. I believe myself to be a fair person, or at least I put enormous effort into being one. So I have to evaluate what caused me to make such decisions. What did I miss? Why was I comfortable doing so? If I wasn't, why did to continue to proceed? Was it a calculated risk? Were there any red flags that I missed? If so, why? Any emotional or financial greed? Various questions I asked myself. For some questions, I struggle to find any answers. However, by asking these questions, I've learned that I overlooked matters that could have changed my decisions; that was what I lacked, and I hope that I remember this lesson in the future and not make the same mistake. This evaluation I took upon myself helped me make decisions based on my mental peace with understanding the consequences of letting go or taking action to get my money back. Protecting integrity has a price. Nothing is free in life, and obtaining a peaceful mind has its price. No one gets away with anything if we examine our lives through truth lenses.